2010-oct-15

I learned today that I have "myxoma".
This is an email that I sent to all my close family members.

To all my dears,

2 hours ago I returned from volleyball and I had good time - good workout.

Before volleyball, one week after I had the Echo test, I was to see the cardiologist, dr.S who informed me about their findings in my heart.

Dr. S took me "per pasuch" and led me to the Echo machine screen to have a look at my heart.

While walkig to the screen he told me that God smiles from time to time at people and that in my case He smiled a lot. I got a feeling that something serious is going on because dr. S looked like a man who does not make wrongful use of the name of the Lord your God.

Dr. S showed me the screen where pulsed my heart as of 1 week ago. "You have a mass in your heart that does not belong there and that have to be removed".

I understood first that I have "mess" in my heart... (nothing new - that was my first thought, sometime I am confused, spiritually, and have many things in my heart that do not belong there). But he was talking about my physical heart and that I have some "mass" in my left artrium that, according to his opinion, has to be removed (open heart surgery).

And that God's smile? Dr. S wanted to see if my heart walls are not too thick (fat) and instead he found tumor in my heart.

Exact results/findigs - in the medical terminology - are here: "There is a 32 x 42 mm mass attached to the intaatrial septum and anterior mitral valve leaflet, pedunculated, prolapsing, causing 2mm Hg mean gradient across mitral valve at the HR pf 75/min. Not calsified, but central areas of clearing are noted". And, by hand, dr.S added: "Likely left Atrial Myxoma".

I asked him how long is that mass in my heart? He said he did not know. 1 year? 10 years? Maybe from my birth?

I asked if I could live with it without any open heart surgery. He said, yes, but the risk of stroke or heart attack would be very high. "It is a time bomb", he concluded.

He said he would send me for angiogram and then for consultations with dr. R, who already had been informed and who already had agreed to do surgery.

O my God, it looked very serious. I tried to cover my deep concerns with saying that I planned to go play volleyball after this appointment. He smiled and said, "Go". So I did go ...

Here are some of my thoughts:
- that mass that I carry in my heart is there already for longer time; the differnce is that we did not know about it and now we know
- it is necessary for me to compare the risks of going for surgery or to live with myxoma
- every day we live is a GIFT

I love you all

o :)

p.s. You will certainly find more info on Wikipedia

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